How One’s Life is Defined

In Uncategorized on December 17, 2012 at 10:00 pm

My troubles, bad genetics, difficult recoveries, even difficult diagnoses, these are all things that will pass.  While I am inside of a difficult year in regards to my health, this is not a permanent condition and I am not defined by these difficulties unless I choose to be.  But I have a choice.  The events of this past week have been a glaring reminder that what has befallen me does not even near the category of tragedy.  My troubles are temporary, and at most they are difficult inconveniences.

An entire town of people will forever be defined by the masacre that was visited upon their children.  And in this, they had no choice.  There will never be a day where the loss and emptiness of their missing children will not ring in their ears and tear at the very seams that hold human beings together.  They are broken, and no amount of national grief, gun control laws or heightened security can change this.  They are defined by their loss, by tragedy.

I am not suggesting that from this point forward that all of our troubles should be compared to the most horrific event in recent history.  I have already complained about mundane matters over the weekend.  But for my own part, I am reminded that difficult things are not tragic things.  Tragedy moves in and takes over whomever it touches.  Were I to die from these bad genetics, my life would not be defined by that death- it would simply be a sad end to a happy story.  Tragedy is a story cut short, a group of children who, as my eight year old son pointed out, were too small to defend themselves.  And I don’t seek out meaning in these events- I don’t believe that everything happens for a reason or that God needed angels- tragedy has no meaning, and even if it did, who really cares as they bury six year olds.

I am grateful for health care, for doctors and nurses who have seen to my care, for my mother who stayed with me after surgery, for my sister and my father who share my genetic anomalies and have fought their own ‘difficult inconveniences’ as a result.  I am grateful that my life is not defined by tragic events and wish with my whole heart that I could carry an ounce of the burden that those bereaved parents must feel tonight.  But mostly I am grateful that my son is sleeping soundly down the hall.  May my life always be enriched by his presence and never defined by his absence.

  1. He’s a good egg.

  2. Wow-you really are an amazing writer as well as an amazing woman. I am proud to be your sister. What a powerful post! Xxoo me

  3. Beautifully stated.

  4. Beautifully put. Thanks for the reminder.




  5. I missed this entry when you posted it as we were out of the country vacationing, but we couldn’t get away from the story – it was being discussed on the internatonal news down in Mexico on a daily basis. I wondered what the rest of the world thinks of us? We have a tarnished repuation in many aspects, but how pitiful we are that we can’t find ways to minimize these kind of tragedies? I agree, there is no good or godliness in such a thing, except to remind us to hug and cherish our children daily.

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